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Sunday, May 27, 2012

wordless

deeply frustated! kecewa..A BIG KECEWA!!

at last, i know the truth and the answer for the big WHY that always haunted me and the reason why i can't let you go(forget you) before this,it  is because the BIG WHY..now,i start to really get rid of you in my mind..i'allah i can!!..seeing you already warmly welcome into that girl life and how you treat her well..i can't go far..she's the one that you pick..you've met her parents,be a imam for her brothers..all the promises that i hold tightly before,it's gone already..tq mr.ribut..for that girl,please take care of him,i do love him till now and he's your already..love him for me..

no wonder why yr siblings is so into her..the dreams to open restaurant together,declared the bond that we've when i am 20 is all lie..a big lie..


*tibe2 teringat waktu sweet moment with you dulu..start with go tuition together,lend you my books....have chit-chat in my house with my parents permissions..you give me a teddy *i love you*..chocs bar on my birthday..jogging together..played badminton together..and so many things..tq for the love that you give me even it's not-last till akad..the attentions,advises,and your cares and your love..

#thank you mr. ribut a.k.a my mr.saser..a.k.a my nextdoor boy.
for him that used to be my A.

Thursday, May 24, 2012

Friday, May 18, 2012

seketika di kampung

hari ini hari jumaat,18 may 2012..esok piala FA akhir aka berlangsung..hehe..moga2  KELANTAN menang!!

i'm doing great here..at first memang agak sukar..have to adapt with new routines semua but after been through  all of it..it's simple and easy actually..have to be more patient je..nak handle oldies bukanlah perkara yang mudah..mereka cukup sensitive and amat gemar bercakap(usually cakap benda yg sama je) so,at first tu memang tak dapat nak terima..yelah,i'm so not a person yg boleh tahan orang cakap banyak2 and arah aku suruh buat macam2 benda..even if ada orang cakap dengan nada suara yg tingi pun aku akan tersentap apatah lagi suruh aku buat macam2..i know what i have to do..so don't need to remind me 1000 times!! one just enough okay? sebabnya..it'll stick strongly in my mind..don't believe?try me lah..tehee..

many exciting things that i've done here were:

1. do some painting on papa's kdin great walls..heheee
2. nursing my grandma..jengjengjeng!
3. soon..go to KURSUS KAHWIN..big laugh!

hey!!
 go to kursus kahwin doesn't mean that i dah nak kahwin..just as preparation..lagipun hal ini kan ilmu..malas nak serabut time betul2 i nak kahwin nanti *cewahh*

i have my own target..nak ended up my single life when i am 23..hehe..harap2 termakbul doakan ku ini..so,sape2 yg berkenan boleh lah masuk meminang..hahaha(promotepromote)..i gurau jelah..jgn dok pikir aku kempen diri aku pulak eh?? saja je..tapi kalau ada pun apa salahnye..dah jodoh..i terima aje..asal ada agama..baik akhlak,budi pekerti..ada latar belakang susur galur yg baik..educated..hormat orang tua..i on je..hahaha


now...lesen kereta..haiyaa..saya masih belum ada lesen kereta maa..yelah,org duk sibuk2 ambil lepas spm..aku pulak gi sibuk2 belajar memasak..well..it's a skills and sangatlah berguna time future nanti..bukan setakat boleh masak for husband and family..silap2 haribulan,i retired awal..boleh open my own restaurant with my loving hubby..insya'allah..besar cita-cita itu kan?

well,before this aku memang selalu jugalah berangan-angan nak open my own empire..AYNAZAFA SDN BHD..nama syarikat hasil gabungan nama my siblings..aku nak open sport center for my onle and the one brother ZAHIN..sekolah tahfiz for my second sister HUSNINA..and beauty center for my adik, FATNIN..aku pula?pemegang saham terbesar for all companies..

rasa2 macam nak buka restoran,yelah dulu ada seseorang yg membakar semangat suruh open that restaurant..now,he's already be my past but i'll always looking forward to fulfill all my dreams..

bila di imbau kembali,banyak jugalah antara dreams aku yg dah terlaksana..alhamdullilah..aku bersyukur..impian masa kecil..remaja and now..mungkin masa tercapainya impian itu je yg lambat sikit..tapi,itulah dinamakan ujian..ganjaran akan tetap diperoleh bagi mereka yg bersabnar menunggu tanpa putus harapan..

keran..sehebat apa pun perancangan kita,hebat lagi perancangan ALLAH!

ALLAHUAKHBAR!! takbir kuat bagi bergena sikit alam ini..(malu?)
amboi,nyanyi melalak mcm kera kena belacan tak malu pula ye>suruh takbir malu pula kamu?? parah parah..check diri cepat sebelum terlambat..


okeylah..before i tamatkan my entry kali ini..saya nak ucapkan syukur kepada semua nikmat yg telah saya terima..

alhamdullilah syukur kerana:

  1. saya masih bernafas himgga ke saat ini
  2. saya masih mempunyai ummi dan papa
  3. juga masih punya tokwe(nenek)..sidi(atuk) dan mok(moyang) serta keluarga yg lain
  4. masih mampu mendengar dgn jelas(kdg2 je pekak sikit..tersumbat le tuu)
  5. masih dapat melihat walaupun  terpaksa menggunaka kacamata untuk lebih jelas..
  6. masih punya kelurga bahagia..
  7. punya kekuatan untuk belajar..

dan macam2 lagi..syukur untuk semua

Thursday, May 3, 2012

it's time to clean up!

assalamualaikum buddies!

well well well...yesterday i managed to get rid of my old stuffs permanently out from my room..hehe!!

habuk memang banyak tok sah cakap lah kan...berguni-guni..it's a good medicine actually since i got flu..haha(maksud sebaliknyerlah kan)

memang penat xingat dunia..i arrange balik sume barang dalam bilik tuh..i moved almari..my 2 heavy study tables..my katil and some craps stuffs..fuh fuh fuh..nak tercabut tangan and urat perut time angkat semua barang barang tuh..mana tak nye,if ringan consider lagi lah kan..ni berat haiiahh..masya'allah!!

after hours in there..my flu comes to worse and i decided to stop for awhile..went to mall and pasar malam then come back to finished the undone work..

the result :
 it's not turned up as what i wiSh for but it quite okay lah..im not really pushed on that yet because i'm going back to kelantan tonight..so if i set my bed tidy and neatly..no one will sleep there and my liltle sister will use my rooms to play with her friends and i surely dont like that to be happen..heh!

after i come back from my village i promised to myself to wipeout all dusts and arrange all books in myrooms and remove all unimportnat stuffs and my outfits(give it away to those yg lebih memerlukan dari saya)
iyelah..if baju banyak sgt sampai tak terpakai pun tak elok juga..nanti kat akhirat nak jawab apa? sebab itu dah boleh masuk kategori membazir..padahal semua sedia maklum bahawa membazir itu satu amalan syaitan..


nanti i'll attached my cleaning room progress photos here..(ada problem sikit nak upload)

ok,done with that..

before i end my story,i just want to say something..jangan lupa solat..my heart almost stopped for awhile when i read an article about azab if sengaja lupa solat..or tinggal solat..i admit that i kadang2 pun ter-missed one or two..astagfirullah,berdosa betul..bukan i tak tahu tapi kadangkala tu lalai,leka dengan pekerjaan dan nikmat dunia..insya'allah akan saya jaga solat saya dengan baik selepas ini..harap2 kawan diluar sana pun sama lah ye? yang mana kurang itu,qada lah dan gantilah dengan memperbanyakkan amalan solat sunat..moga2 hidup kita kelak disana akan diberkati dan perjalanan akhir tatkala menuju ke alam barzakh dipermudahkan dan tidak diaibkan..amin..

ayuh berubah kearah insan yang lebih baik!!


HAYYA A'LA FALAH YA SIDDIQI..

Wednesday, May 2, 2012

dare to dream BIG!

Assalamualaikum guys!

recently...hujan lebat betul! kilat sabung-menyabung bagai tiada tanda untuk berhenti..terus berdentum umpama  mengisytiharkan perang..someone has told me,hujan yang disertai kilat sabung-menyabung menandakan DIA sedang marah dan menghapuskan anasir2 luar yang jahat..
              yakni syaitan itu adalah musuhmu yang nyata
banyak sungguh maksiat yang berleluasa sekarang ini kan? gerun pula hati yuni bila melihatkan situasi ini semua..harap harap diri ini dan sahabat diluar sana sentiasa dalam perlindungan dan rahmat-Nya.

WELL..back to our story here..dare to dream big.
everyone have a dream i guess,do u have one? because i have tonnes of dreams..
oh yaa..(saya sebenarnya tengah curi tulang sebentar from finishing my mom's stuffs)
hehe..ok,cut it off..let's share a lilttle dreams of mine..

when i was in elementary school,i always want to get into boarding school and i actually get an offered but my parents didnt allowed me to go there..as an obedient child,i couldnt say "no"..no regret.

why?? as i grew up..stayed at home to be with family is the best part ever..my father used to say this to me when i started to bring it up why i couldnt go there(school) padahal my others friends can?

papa said " kak, masa kakak sekolah ni  jelah awak boleh sama-sama dengan papa dan ummi..if kakak sekolah asrama..masa kakak dengan keluarga akan terhad..lepas kakak habis sekolah u'll surely masuk asrama to further your study,then graduate..get a job..get married then move out from this house to start your own life..u'll not longer stay under one roof with us..so do appreciate the moments that you have with us..your family..kita tak tau bila dan siapa yang akan pergi dulu..whether is me(papa),ummi or you? jadi hargailah setiap saat dan setiap detik anda bersama kami"

so,the rest is history..i never bring it up again..

when i was 16-17..i have dream..a really big one..to further my study in overseas..menjadi musafir..menimba ilmu di negara asing..many of my cousins manage to get a place there and also my friends now..me?? not qualified enough..i never stopped dreaming that one day i also will go there..maybe i'll take a different path..not like the others..^_^ (who knows what happen next right?)

am i sad? yes a bit..i'm sad because i dont give 100% my efforts to grab my goals..i didnt well performed during my SPM..but still,no regret! BECAUSE HE KNOWS THE BEST FOR ME..
maybe it's not the time yet..or maybe i'll turned up to be big headed person if i get what i want..or maybe he want me to sabar more and keep continuing make doa towards HIM...

now..my target is to help my parents as much as i can (sementara nyawa masih ada) and menabur bakti towards my grandpa and grandma...i want to make them happy..to see their smile is a blessing to me..

O Allah, do give me strength to do this..you what is the best for me..show me the right path with your guidelines..


as i still alive..i wont stop dreaming and trying my best to achieve it as long as that dreams arent not a (ntahahape) punye dream..


so..dare to dream big buddies!! be yourself is the best..no one like copycaters..show your true colours..make them (this world)  realise of your existence..no regret of what have been done in the past..all happened have reasons and it's up to us to find what it is about..

smile and go for it!!